I just recently became aware that it was possible to impeach someone who is no longer in office. Who knew? Well, if you look up the definition of impeachment you’ll discover it’s not only possible; it happens all the time. The most basic definition of impeachment is to accuse someone of misconduct. By that definition, I’m getting impeached on a pretty regular basis. The more common definition is to accuse a public official of misconduct while in office. We normally assume impeachment is reserved for presidents, but here’s some good news – You can impeach anybody. I’ve been president of two table tennis organizations and a church youth group. I assume the statute of limitations prevents any charges being brought up from my teenage years. I probably can’t be removed from office in my current position. Jon’s Table Tennis Training only has one employee. I have considered impeaching myself, but decided to complete my term and vote myself back into office as permanent ping pong dictator.
My biggest concern is that I could be impeached by AGTTA. It’s been at least five years since I held any office at Atlanta’s oldest table tennis club. Now that people know you can impeach past presidents, nobody’s safe. Though I was never voted out of office and resigned in good standing, there could be an impeachment movement growing. A good number of AGTTA members didn’t realize I was president and might be shocked to know their leader looked so guilty.
Forgive me for mocking the entire concept of the current impeachment proceedings. You might think it’s a very serious business, while I think it’s hateful, malevolent, spiteful, malicious, mean, nasty, vicious, devious, vindictive, obnoxious, snotty. unkind, mean-spirited, and evil. Wow! That’s a lot of synonyms. But wait! There’s more. How about bitchy, contemptuous, venomous, caustic, and opprobrious? You might have to look that last one up. Have I gone too far? Maybe, we can just agree to disagree? That’s an interesting concept. We could agree to disagree; or we can just impeach…impeach….impeach.